“The Proposal (Survivor’s Club Book 1)” by Mary Balogh –
“But those who are most obviously in love and well suited to each other often do not withstand the first test life throws their way. And life always does that sooner or later. Think of poor Flavian and his erstwhile betrothed as a case in point. When two people are not well suited and know it but are in love anyway, then perhaps they are better prepared to meet any obstacles in their path and to fight them with all the weapons at their disposal. They do not expect life to be easy, and of course it never is. They have a chance of making it through anyway. And all this is pure conjecture, Hugo. I really do not know.”
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I read this wrong at first and initially disagreed, but then I realized how absolutely right it is!
Illsuited applies not to the heart of the relationship (love, affection, sexuality, etc), but to those incidental things that get in the way: health, age, social status, finances, etc.
My husband and I are stronger because he’s old and broken. I feel sorry for young couples who are hit out of left field by the unexpected.